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Clash of the titans: Cage fights that deserve gallery seats

While Musk and Zuck prepare, My Kolkata sets up epic fights where fictional universes collide as heroes and villains battle it out

Pooja Mitra | Published 28.07.23, 04:02 PM

Mark and Musk might be taking a small breather, plotting their next move, but the epic social media cage fight has got us thinking. What would happen — in a parallel universe, if you please — when fictional giants from the books and movies are pitted against each other?

The prospective stand-offs include Feluda vs. Tenida, Lord Voldemort vs. Night King, Arya Stark vs. Shuri, and so on. From gritty settings to intense background scores and surprise endings — the possibilities are endless. Sounds fun? Read on to see what we had in mind…

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Feluda vs Tenida

We imagine this would be a pretty cool, and hilarious, face-off! Magajastra versus slapstick wit, Feluda’s dishoom dishoom skills versus Tenida’s chantis and mugdhobodhs. Chances are before it delves into a physical battle in a ring, it will be an entertaining battle of one-liners and wisecracks — the best kind! Plus, not only are there two fictional greats, it is also the giants of Bengali Literature — Satyajit Ray versus Narayan Gangopadhyay — sizing each other up. All you can do is buckle up, get ready to laugh and enjoy the double dhamaka!

Pathaan vs Moriarty

A classic cop-villain drama, with a twist. Yes, Pathaan might bust out the karate chops while Moriarty is all about mind games, the Bollywood hero is a spy too and this can be a stellar spy-verse chapter. Who better than the posh and suave antihero Moriarty to get into a filmy fight with a brain-and-brawn hero. When these personalities clash, an arch nemesis is born and a story is written. We’re getting James Bond vibes, are you?

Sherlock and Kakababu

Sherlock and Kakababu are pitted against each other to solve an unsolved case. The competition is stiff, the contenders are the two best minds in sleuthing (cue the Sherlock eye-roll). The one who manages to solve it will be declared the World’s Best Detective. Moriarty is ROFL-ing as he recovers from his fight with Pathaan (we are team King Khan and Moriarty has lost, sorry). And every person Raja Roy Chowdhury, aka Kakababu, ever bested is pouring an extra peg, we think. Doctor Watson and Sontu might bite their nails off, or just share a toast about the idiosyncrasies of their best friends.

As for us, we’re taking the front seat as the intense background score comes on and the fast-paced, high-adrenaline adventure begins. Come, join us.

Lord Voldemort vs Night King

He-who-must-not-be-named meets the icy leader of the White Walkers — two nasty villains from two equally magical and sinister worlds. What. A. Treat. Perhaps, Harry Potter and Jon Snow will just take a breather and enjoy what might be the treat of their lives. We are imagining a dark night with heavy snowfall or rain, pin-drop silence, whistling and rustling thanks to the winds and a scene set in a melancholy blue to match the contenders’ aesthetics. We shall wait with baited breath, listening carefully to the calm before the storm. The Lord and the King will stand face to face, looking into each other’s eyes. There’s a smirk on their faces. Now, all we need to do is pitch this scene to the filmmakers.

Ra.One vs Thanos

Arjun Rampal’s Ra.One with Josh Brolin’s Thanos. This is one prospective Holly-meets-Bolly situation that a nation with a projected population of 130 crores will be all pumped up about. Put Ra.One in an armour like Thanos, replace G.One (we love SRK but yeh dil maange more in this cage fight), let AI take charge, supply us with unlimited coke and popcorn and a seat in the audience, and let the match begin.

Shiva vs Bob Biswas

Imagine this: Shiva is busy romancing Isha Chatterjee. Bob Biswas emerges, knocks on his shoulder and says, “Nomoshkar, ek minute”.... uff case jome kheer! The smiling villain who sends a chill down the spine and the dreamy eye Sawariyaan in a cage fight is going to be like one of those fabled battles between the good and the evil. Bob has stealth, Shiva has powers, Bob can launch a surprise attack, Shiva can surprise you. We can even churn out a moral story chapter out of the aamna saamna. The biggest bonus would be if A. R. Rahman, Alma Ferovic, and Arjun Chandy come together for a background track. Wondering what will happen when Agniastra meets the serial killer’s silencer gun and stealth? The prospect is too filmy to not relish.

Arya Stark and Shuri

Two kick-ass young guns who mean well but are not really a team. This one might involve some time travel, or multidimensional travel but we imagine this starts as a cage fight and ends with both the leading ladies of their respective kingdoms joining hands. Now, that’s a GoT x Marvel spectacle to watch out for! The girl who has no name can use her shroud of anonymity, the two warrior princesses can team up and make an all-woman army with Daenerys Targaryen joining as the third force. Now all they need is a catchphrase as powerful as ‘Wakanda Forever’!

Krrish vs Batman

We can get behind this epic face-off of the mask-wearing, black-robed vigilantes. Whether Krishna decides to battle wits and moods with Bruce or Krrish decides to battle Batman, either is a combat with five-star excitement. It doesn’t have to be all Fight Club and we definitely want Krishna and Bruce in the gallery. We imagine a Nolan-esque saga with different identities clashing, shades of grey, a moral dilemma, and more. Where’s that popcorn!

Last updated on 30.10.23, 08:14 PM
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