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‘Eternals’, the ‘What If’ version

What does 'Eternals' really want to be? A Marvel devotee is left wondering what if...

Chandreyee Chatterjee | Published 06.11.21, 04:43 PM
The Eternals

The Eternals

Marvel

I have never walked out of a movie theatre after watching a Marvel film and felt vaguely undecided about whether it worked for me or not. I have always had clear emotions about the past films — Iron Man was funny, Iron Man 3 was boring, Avengers was invigorating, Captain America: Civil War was brilliant, Guardians of the Galaxy was entertaining, Thor: Ragnarok was delightful, Shang Chi: The Legend of Ten Rings was magical etc, etc. Confusion was never an emotion I associated with the MCU... till Eternals. But I guess that had a lot to do with the film itself, which seemed confused about what it wanted to be — an emotionally grounded, inclusive indie-flick about aliens with superpowers or a CGI superhero blockbuster. And I can’t help but fall back on another recent Marvel could-have-been-brilliant offering and wonder What If…

What if… the film had made up its mind?

Chloe Zhao, the Oscar-winning director of Nomadland, is known for her gritty, realistic films, indie and niche. Simple human interactions, emotions and moral dilemmas are her speciality, along with glorious sunset shots, all of which she tries to bring to Eternals but is left tripping on the traditional MCU film guidelines, especially in order to fit in epic CGI battles. You are often left feeling like you are watching two disparate films.

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One where god-like aliens, who have been sent to Earth to protect humans and ensure their evolution (without direct intervention), struggle with the dilemma of watching history unfold (sometimes hideously) and not being able to do anything or whether sacrificing a planet for the greater good is right or wrong and the divisiveness of these dilemmas.

The other is where the superheroes don their costumes, quip and joke and whop CGI-monster ass. I wish it could decide what it wanted to be and not leave the audience feeling uncertain. Because the fine balance (which No Time to Die did beautifully, giving Bond a human face without compromising his signature style) seemed pretty much out of grasp.

What if… it was a show on Disney+ Hotstar?

There are 10 Eternals whose journey spans 7,000 years and covers crucial events of human civilisation. Instead of the Hiroshima bombing (why Nagasaki is ignored no one knows) being a blip (the empty ruins of Hiroshima felt like it was the Blip, with no sight of the aftermath) on the radar with one Eternal anguishing over the role they inadvertently played in it, it could have been an entire episode that captured the actual horror of it.

A show on Disney+Hotstar would also make the tedious (and in the context of a film — yes, even 155 mins is a limited time — necessary) exposition dumps and background sketching unnecessary. And maybe, just maybe, we would feel a little bit more invested in the Eternals and their dilemmas and heroics.

What if… the film did justice to the diversity?

(Left to right): Gilgamesh, Makkari and Phastos

(Left to right): Gilgamesh, Makkari and Phastos

Marvel.com

Phastos (Brian Tyree Henry), the tech guy among the Eternals, is gay, is married and has a cute child. Makkari (Lauren Ridloff), Marvel’s version of The Flash, is the first deaf superhero. Gilgamesh (Don Lee) is the first Korean superhero in a Hollywood film. Karun (Harish Patel) as Kingo’s (Kumail Nanjiani) valet/manager steals most of the scenes he is in. The women mostly play lead roles not “also stars” ones, unlike “and the Wasp”, “and Natasha”, “Hi Ms Potts” or “Sif who?”.

(Left to right): Ajak, Thena and Sersi

(Left to right): Ajak, Thena and Sersi

Marvel.com

Even though organically incorporated, unfortunately, none of them gets the time they deserve (an impossible task even if the film was another hour longer) making it still feel like a gesture instead of genuine. There is a kiss between two men (a lip-to-lip kiss as Rani from Queen would clarify) but there is hardly much more. Makkari spends her time hidden away in the Eternal’s alien ship so isn’t there for chunks of the film. Salma Hayek as the leader of the Eternals, Ajak, has a truncated role that hardly taps into her potential. Angelina Jolie poses (albeit very well) more than acts in a one-note role as Thena (which actually could have been the most complex character).

What if… the end-credit could be put in at the interval?

(Spoiler alert!) The mid-credit feels more like catering to fans of a certain age-group, but the end-credit is exciting, teasing two important characters in Marvel’s next phase — Kit Harington’s Dave Whitman adopting his Black Knight alias and, as the director has already revealed, Mahershala Ali as Blade, whose voice we hear. So yes, the end-credit was one of the most exciting things about the film. Can we just jump to the film about the Daywalker already?!

What if… we could just watch 'Avengers: Endgame' instead?

'Avengers: Endgame' is the only Marvel film that is longer than 'Eternals'

'Avengers: Endgame' is the only Marvel film that is longer than 'Eternals'

Marvel

I am not saying this because it had all our favourite characters (who became our favourite characters over 21 films). It had all our favourite characters and gave them their due amidst all the CGI battles and the quips and the pep talks and the hat doffings. I mean when all, and I mean all, the Avengers assembled during the last battle it gave us goosebumps. Eternals — the biggest ensemble after the Avengers — joining in Uni-Mind… meh! Also, Avengers: Endgame is the only Marvel film that is longer than Eternals, and not once did we have to check how long it has been.

Last updated on 06.11.21, 04:46 PM
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